2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21
This article will address issues of certifying marriage before the Eyes of the Lord in Orthodoxy, respectively, we consider what is needed for a wedding in the Orthodox Church.
In the days of our distant great-grandparents, the wedding was the only true and recognized way in society so that people in love (and not quite in love) could live together and be considered a family. So-called cohabitation was despised, considered a low and unworthy thing. Few girls dared to do that. What to do before the wedding in the church, people knew the way they now know the alphabet.
How was wedding treated before?
Even secretly married people, however, as well as those who were forcibly married (it happened, too), it was almost impossible to debunk. Indeed, in order for such a marriage to be considered invalid before heaven, certain conditions had to be met. Sothat in the case of a secret wedding, there was nothing left for others to do but come to terms with the independence of the newlyweds.
A record of the ceremony was entered into the Church books, everything was recorded from the words of those who were getting married, without presenting supporting documents. Church records for some people were almost the only documents in their lives, confirming the birth, baptism and wedding.
Over time, in the raging passions of the revolution and atheism, the wedding ceremony has practically become a thing of the past. Churches collapsed. Communism marched across the country with broad strides, Stalin's cult of personality crushed the way of life of the people. Accordingly, all religious festivals were banned and many church sacraments were also banned.
The Church lost its powers and no longer had the right to fill out any paperwork.
A person who decided at that time to testify his marriage before God risked a lot. He could be expelled from the party, but it is worth noting that being a "non-communist" in those days was not only shameful, but also dangerous. In addition to being expelled from the party, a person was also threatened with dismissal from work so that the church "opium" would not spread in the team. That is why people grew up who could not even imagine such a ceremony as a wedding in the Orthodox Church. This, it must be said, did not have a very favorable effect on post-revolutionary society.
Marrying and getting divorced has become very easy. A couple who wanted to live together had to submit an application to the registry office and at the appointed time come to register their marriage. Seal,painting, and a new family was born.
Marriage in our time
A few more decades have passed, and now the wedding ceremony has again become widespread. But no one canceled the marriage registration.
Both newlyweds and more mature couples, who at one time fell under the "wedding bans", are getting married.
It is possible that from time to time you also thought about how you can get married. And perhaps you, like many people, were interested in the question of what is needed for a wedding in a church.
The most important thing
You need to understand whether the desire to tie oneself with indestructible bonds from the heart is coming. Does your couple understand that such a ceremony imposes obligations on those who are getting married, which must be fulfilled in this life and until death. Thanks to the prayers read during the wedding, the couple becomes forever united. It will be very difficult to discredit such a union, it is required to comply with many conditions, to prove that you cannot be a husband and wife, to wait for the permission of the Metropolitan.
To our great regret, many newlyweds do not understand the seriousness of this sacrament. That is why they arrange a wedding as a kind of fashionable element of marriage. They do not disdain to meet the young at the exit from the church, dousing the bride with champagne to the joyful and completely inappropriate cries at the church gates: "Bitter!"
And only after fully realizing the responsibility for such an important step, you have the right to think about what you need for a church wedding, what indestructible dogmas exist and what items you need to buyfor such an exciting and serious ceremony.
Father will not marry you if…
- You are related down to the fourth generation.
- One of you is an atheist who attends the ceremony only to please his half.
- Do not try to get married if you have already gone through this ceremony in your life and are not debunked now.
- Spiritual kinship will also prevent you from becoming spouses.
- Some of you belong to another religion.
- Mental deviations in one of the couple.
- In Russia they will not get married also in the absence of documents authorizing this action.
It is useful to know in advance what documents are needed for a church wedding. Usually, the required documents are, of course, passports and a marriage certificate. Since the revolution, the registry office has remained authorized to issue marriage documents. Therefore, no one will marry you without stamps in your passport.
What you need for a church wedding: a list of necessary attributes
- The image of the Savior and the image of the Mother of God. Well, if these icons are preserved in your family, you can (even desirable) take them. If not, then it is worth buying in advance at the church.
- Wedding candles, buy them in advance at the church kiosk.
- Engagement rings for the bride and groom.
- Wedding towel.
- Towel, napkins for candles (from burning drops of wax).
- It may well be what you need to do before the wedding in the churchdonation to the temple. Usually the donation price is fixed.
- Crosses for wear. You are baptized people, so the crosses must be on you.
- Cahors, wine used in church sacraments.
- Loaf (optional).
The bride must wear white during the ceremony. Closed shoulders, non-translucent dress, discreet makeup - this is what you need for a wedding in an Orthodox church. And even if a lady of a very advanced age gets married, this does not change things. Pay attention to the bride's manicure, it should not be flashy.
The "youngest" age of the bride must be at least sixteen years old. The groom can only get married from the age of eighteen. The most mature bride who will be allowed to get married in a church is a lady who has reached the age of sixty years. The most "adult" man who will be allowed to get married should not be older than seventy.
Rings: what are needed and what do they mean
Which rings are needed for church weddings are still a matter of controversy. Previously, the groom put a silver ring on his future wife's finger, but the bride put on a gold ring for the groom. Wedding rings were recognized only smooth, without engravings and decorations. Because the ring is a symbol of the endless love of a married couple, and the smoothness of this product meant that the path of the newlyweds through life would be as smooth as the surface of the rings. But sometimes people made engravings on the inside of the ring, this was allowed only ifwhen they engraved some words from a prayer to protect marriage.
Today, young people put gold rings on each other's fingers, sometimes having designs adorned with precious stones. Although if the ring is very pretentious, the priest may refuse to marry you. So try to stick to the charter. For a wedding, simple wedding rings that you exchanged at the time of registration are great.
Why go to church before the wedding
Preparing yourself for the sacrament of the wedding, you need to visit the church, talk with the priest. The minister of the church will tell you what you need to do before the wedding in the church for your couple. Usually the need for fasting, the Sacrament of Confession and the Sacrament of Communion is stipulated. The father will also coordinate the wedding day with you. It will not be possible to get married on any chosen day, for such a ceremony there are also some Orthodox dogmas. It will clarify for you whether witnesses are needed at a wedding in a church and what to do if, for some reason, there are still no witnesses. Different situations happen in life, in some temples the spouses are met halfway and provided with people who help during the ceremony and hold crowns over the heads of the bride and groom.
Who are the witnesses? Who can not be put as witnesses at the wedding?
Witnesses at a church wedding ceremony are people who act as guarantors. That is, these people vouch for your union before God. They are also obliged to help in your married life with advice on conflicts and other difficulties.
Permitted to be witnesses:
- A married couple, especiallyif a couple has been married for many years, and their family is an indicator of a good and faithful family for you.
- To relatives from the side of the bride and groom. Here, consider one small nuance: these witnesses do not have the right to enter into a marriage consecrated by the church after they were guarantors at your wedding. This is explained by the fact that, having passed the rite, these people have already become spiritual relatives. And the wedding of spiritual relatives is strictly prohibited!
You can't be witnesses at the wedding:
- The couple you wanted to witness is now divorced. Because people who fail to keep their bonds of marriage will not be able to teach the young anything worthwhile, but will only cause harm.
- A witness-witness couple live in cohabitation, that is, they have not registered their marriage even in state bodies.
- If you are going to invite a couple as witnesses, notify them that in order to get married in a church, you need to provide their marriage certificate.
Duties of witnesses
Witnesses during the ceremony perform some functions, here are the most important of them:
- Keep the crowns over the heads of the young.
- Help with wedding rings, give them during the ceremony.
- Lay a towel under the feet of the young in front of the lectern.
- While passing through the triple procession, walk with the bride and groom.
Wedding in the church takes place in time from forty minutes or more. It is worth warning your guarantors in advance that the crowns are very difficult to keep.
What you need to know more for the wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church
- Woduring the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds should not look back at people, nor should they consider the image. You need to look only at the clergyman, so as not to miss important points and be able to answer questions in time.
- Be sure to be baptized only with your right hand. In the Orthodox faith, it is customary to address a priest with the word "father".
- To be late for the sacrament of marriage is by no means impossible! Consider this moment and better enter the church a little early (about 20 minutes).
- Since the wedding is a rather lengthy process, think about it and take care of your shoes. Don't wear tight high heels. Let the shoes be comfortable so as not to distract you from good thoughts and spiritual joy during the ceremony.
- Turn off your phones while visiting the temple.
- During the ceremony, the female part of the guests should be on the left side of the room, the male part, respectively, on the right.
- Questions related to photo and video filming are discussed in advance.
- During the ceremony, hands are not supposed to be in pockets or holding hands.
Gifts for the newlyweds for the wedding. Which ones to give?
- Usually this is an icon depicting Saints Peter and Fevronia - the patrons of all lovers.
- You can also give silverware or gold to the young.
- Chains of gold or silver will be an appropriate gift. Only chains must be without crosses.
- Noble candlesticks from noblemetals.
- Flowers - this gift is appropriate everywhere, and the wedding ceremony is no exception.
Blessing of parents
Blessing the closest and dearest people - parents - is one of the most important points for creating a happy family. The thing is that the blessing given by parents for a happy and long married life is considered a very strong amulet.
Wedding Signs
- During the wedding process between a couple of young people, no one should pass, otherwise the family will collapse.
- The wedding crown must be worn on the head. If the crown is not worn, the marriage before the Lord is not valid.
- For a long and happy life, it is necessary to do this at the same time during the wedding while blowing out the candles.
For the best and right choice, please visit several cathedrals before deciding which one you want to be married in.
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