2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21
Boys start falling in love at the age of 12. Despite the fact that they find their first love a little later, at the age of 14-16, the memories of the very first girl who attracted attention and excited the blood remain for life. So who do pre-puberty boys choose as the object of their adoration? Most often they fall in love with the teacher. Why this happens, read below.
Why teachers are the subject of adoration
With age, the body changes, hormones begin to be produced in it. They bring about both physiological and psychological changes. Testosterone is a hormone responsible for the development of male sexual characteristics, which begins to be actively produced from the age of 12-14. All boys grow up at different times.
So why do students fall in love with the teacher? Because girls in their 12 years have not yet reached puberty. And the imagination of the boys exciteattractive shape of a young woman. Who do they see the most? That's right, a school teacher. And if she is young and pretty, then it is her guys who choose the object of their adoration. Less common are cases when boys of 12 years old fall in love with the mothers of their friends or girlfriends.
What are signs of attention
People show their love in different ways. And even boys who are just entering adolescence show their feelings in various ways. Some worry quietly, love boils in their head. But some cannot be silent. The most courageous of such individuals can confess their feelings to the teacher. And it's good if this happens tete-a-tete. But often boys confess their love in front of the whole class.
Of course, falling in love with a teacher is not a shame, but then few people want to endure ridicule about this for all their school years. Therefore, the most intelligent children express their feelings on paper. They can throw anonymous notes to the teacher. And modern children can even bother their beloved with SMS or messages on social networks. Boys can give the teacher flowers or sweets, and some do not directly talk about feelings, they explain their gift with sincere gratitude for the knowledge gained.
How to behave as a teacher
It's hard not to get lost in this situation. Young teachers do not always know how to accept signs of attention from students in love. This is not taught in college. So you have to be creative. Girls can declare in front of the whole class thatthey have a lover, a boyfriend, and their engagement is just around the corner. This is a good way to ward off annoying gentlemen. But it's better not to lie. If the "engagement" drags on for 5 years, the next generation of students will no longer believe in these fairy tales.
Lots of boys can fall in love with a teacher at once. In order not to offend any of them, it is not necessary to rudely resign. But it doesn't pay to be gentle either. After all, otherwise students may think that they have a chance. The girl must strictly define the limits of what is permitted and show the children who is in charge in the class. Yes, in such a situation it will not be possible to become a friend to everyone, but the number of fans of a strict teacher will quickly decrease.
How to ward off annoying gentlemen
A teacher should not lie to students or give false hopes. The worst thing a girl can say to an inexperienced boy is "I'll think about it." It is this phrase that the heroines of romantic films use, which the student definitely saw. The best way to temper a boy's ardor is to nip the relationship in the bud. And if all words are powerless, the teacher must change her attitude towards the whole class and make subordinates out of friends. If the student begins to court the teacher, then she can accept his good disposition without crossing the line. It's always best to settle things amicably. Therefore, it is worth giving the boy your friendship, and if he does not require more, then you just need to wait for the time. Soon the “cavalier” will grow up and find a girlfriend by age.
How to behave as a student
Boy 12 years old inschool is having a hard time. His body changes, hormones begin to play, and, as a result, there are quarrels with his parents. And then there's a pretty woman every day looms before my eyes. How should a student behave so as not to disgrace himself in front of the class and the object of his love? The boy should not zealously seek victory at any cost. If he bombards the teacher with messages, then as a result, the parents will be called to school, and the boy will be punished.
Therefore, if you write love letters, then secretly from the object of adoration. The boy can express his tender feelings in the form of help. Gallant deeds will be appreciated by a woman. For example, you can open the door for the teacher, help her carry a heavy stack of textbooks. Of course, this will not evoke reciprocal feelings, since the object of adoration can only give its student its friendly attitude towards him. But the young creature still does not know anything about love, so this, in his eyes, will be a good reward for his labors.
Cases in the lower grades
If a student fell in love with a teacher in the 5th or 6th grade, there is nothing to worry about. Cute notes, sweets and flowers for September 1 and March 8 are all that he can give to the object of his adoration. Let's give an example: a 5th grade student has just moved to a new school and cannot make friends in the class, and a young teacher treats him well and helps him in everything. Of course, a boy instantly makes an idol out of a girl. The student does not dare to confess his feelings, but everything is written on his face. In such a situation, you do not need to change your goodrelations. The boy will soon find friends and change the object of adoration. The situation will improve, but the friendly relations between the teacher and the student will remain.
High School Cases
What to do if a 10th grade student falls in love with a teacher? It is clear that at a very young age, feelings pass quickly, but for a teenager of 16 years old, a teacher may well become a first love. Let us give an example: a young mathematics teacher lives alone with her son, the girl dresses modestly, behaves in accordance with her status and teaches at the 11th grade. One boy, I must say capable, shows a special zeal for learning. He goes to all additional classes and consultations for the exam. And then the young man guards the teacher near her house and confesses his love. Moreover, it gives a chic bouquet of roses. The guy says that he is in love, understands the current situation, is ready to take responsibility and agrees to take care of the girl's son.
The situation is difficult, and you need to immediately tell the student that nothing will work out. Flowers, of course, are not worth taking, so as not to give the guy too much hope. It must be said that there are no reciprocal feelings and cannot be. Yes, the student will be hurt and hurt, but he will cope with it. And if the teacher mumbles, the situation can only get worse. The boy can imagine that the girl is just indecisive and shy. As a result, the student will continue his courtship with double enthusiasm.
Stories
Let's look at a few more examples of how to get out ofsituations where a teenager fell in love with an adult girl.
The guy with his parents moves to a new house. Accordingly, he had to change schools. Getting acquainted with the neighbors on the porch, the boy notices a pretty girl. And then it turns out that she becomes his class teacher. The guy quickly finds a common language with her, but does not dare to tell her about feelings. And then it turns out that the teacher already has a boyfriend who proposed to her. The guy begins to blame himself for indecision. He tells himself that if he had been braver, then the girl of his dreams could have gone to him, and not to anyone else.
Getting out of this situation is quite simple. If the child opened up to you, just tell him that the girl preferred the other not because he was bolder. The teacher had other selection criteria. Her fiance is older, he is we althy and independent. And the boy is just a schoolboy. The student does not need to be upset, he will still find his love, just later, because everything should have its time.
And another short story. A boy of 16 fell in love with a teacher. She was not a qualified teacher, but a student in practice. But after two weeks of classes, the beloved disappears. The student suffers a lot and does not know how to live on. All searches for the beloved were in vain.
There is only one thing you can advise a guy: try to get distracted, go in for sports, build models or program. In general, you need to direct the energy that goes to suffering in the right direction. Love for an idol passes quitefast if it doesn't find any expression path.
And what remains to suffer?
Children are not tormented by their love. They sleep well at night, and do not walk under the windows of their idol. The boy fell in love with a teacher, but with the same ease a movie actress could win his heart. And in both cases, he understands in his soul that these feelings will remain unrequited. This is not a tragedy of life. Soon the student will grow up, his classmates will grow up, and then he will truly fall in love and suffer. The boy will begin to write serenades, buy flowers. And at the age of 12, the suffering is mostly fictional. The student wants to feel like an adult and plays love as much as he plays war.
Parent involvement
Mom and dad should take an active part in their child's life. They need to know about teenage love. It is in this case that it will be easier for parents to understand what is happening with their child. You can support a child only with words and parting words. You can’t tell a young creature that he fills his head with nonsense, it would be better to listen to what the teacher says to him, and not admire her for days on end.
In such a situation, the father's support is important for the son. It is an adult man who must explain to his child that his feelings are a stage of growing up. A father can tell his son that he was once also in love with his teacher, but then he met his mother, and now their family lives happily.
Help from experts
Psychologists say that a teenager fell in love with a teacher because of a lack of love in the family. If momand dad does not give the child enough time, then he tries to find a replacement on the side. And who can best replace parents, if not a teacher? She takes care of the teenager, protects him from trouble, you can joke with her, and she does not scold for every mistake. This is the ideal option. Only the child does not understand the depth of his feelings, so he says that he has fallen in love. Parents should not scold their child for this. They need to spend more time with their son to help him get through the first disappointment of his life.
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