Cranky child. What to do?

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

Probably everyone has seen an unpleasant scene in a supermarket or in the market, when a young mother tries to drag a screaming 4-5-year-old child by the hand from the counter, demanding to buy him a typewriter, gun, doll, candy, ice cream - the list can be continue indefinitely. All her attempts are in vain - from her cry, the child seems to be recharged with energy, and his crying and screaming turn into a real tantrum.

Many sympathetic women try to calm him down. No one pays attention to the fact that the little "blackmailer" is carefully watching what is happening around him. If you imagine that at some point everyone will turn away and start doing their own thing, then the baby will calm down very quickly and turn his attention to something else.

Usually a capricious child is one who could not be taught to communicate correctly, to talk, and in his arsenal of means to achieve the desired is only experience gained up to a year. Namely, I lie and scream.

The psychology of a child up to a year is entirely aimed at communicating with the adults around him, primarily with his mother. At first, he gets attention to himself by using crying. Unfortunately, in the absence of properattention, this weapon remains in small hands for years.

I hate to upset many parents, but if you have a naughty child, then

you are not an authority for him. Imagine a very common situation that illustrates the collapse from the parental pedestal. A young mother has been talking enthusiastically on the phone with her friend for almost an hour.

The child wanders around the apartment, not knowing what to do with himself. He asks his mother to give him an apple. The mother brushes him off and drives him to her room. But he does not leave, he stands nearby, begins to sob, falls to the floor, whines, wails. As you understand, the conversation with a friend is spoiled, the mother goes to the refrigerator with irritation and brings two apples to the child.

The child very quickly realizes that his mother's "no" is not at all final, therefore, listening to his mother is not at all necessary, and he is the head of the house - after all, he received an apple, and even two.

A capricious child begins to understand that his mother is absolutely indifferent, that in fact he needed not an apple, but attention. There is a classic picture of ransom. The older the child gets, the more expensive this substitution of attention will cost parents.

Very often, communication with a child for many mothers comes down to a few trainer commands - “sit, I said”, “hands off”, etc. When such a mother says: “I have a capricious child, what about him do?”, the answer, as it seems to us, lies on the surface. We need to stop talking to him.trained animal.

The child grows, changes, and parents often do not keep up with him. If the relationship of parents to their beloved child does not change, then his whims will not disappear even over the years. Before you lament the fact that you have a capricious child, start with yourself. Learn to communicate with him as with an adult, do not "lisp", do not try to fulfill any of his whims, explain to the baby every decision you make.