Dating foreigners on international sites: pros and cons

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

In today's Russia, most girls prefer to "support a local producer" and, without hesitation, marry Russians. However, many Russian women also look at overseas countries and at the local gentlemen. Sometimes sideways and with sincere distrust, and sometimes with an open mind and genuine interest. This happens for various reasons, and mercantile considerations do not always come first. Let's plunge into this raging sea of human passions and study what guides our romantic, matrimonial or even materialistic compatriots who are looking for a better life on international dating sites with foreigners.

Irina V. from Cherepovets

“I did everything quite spontaneously, I flew with my friends to rest in Spain, in Madrid I met Sanchez, my future husband, before that I corresponded with him on one dating online resource. I also didn’t know Spanish at that time, they communicated more with gestures or inbroken English. I just fell in love with this friendly hot country, with its hospitable people and, of course, with Sanchez, my future husband. And quite a secret: here in Cherepovets you will not find such tapas and such Andalusian gazpacho. I'm just crazy about the local cuisine! Learning how to cook paella.”

Marina M. from Moscow

“In Moscow, I had my own small business - a hairdresser. I didn’t think at all to get acquainted with foreigners for the purpose of a serious relationship, I used my profile on a dating site with foreigners mainly for learning English - I communicated with native speakers. I flew to London to visit my brother, who is studying to be a designer there. With Joseph, ironically, I also met in a hairdresser, but in London. He was there waiting for his sister, who was getting her hair done. We talked about this and that, he turned out to be a great lover of Russian ballet. It was like a spark ran between us - love at first sight. It turned out that we had previously communicated with him on a dating site with foreigners, when I was still living in Moscow. Well, we decided - everything, this is fate! Now we are thinking where we should live - in London or in Moscow.”

Irina Sh. from Urengoy

“In Germany, I did an internship from work, but it turned out that I stayed for permanent residence, I didn’t plan anything in advance. Eric himself is from Canada, he works for an international corporation in Berlin, so we are both in the same boat - mastering an unfamiliar country and learning German together. We met on a famous dating site. Fate, perhaps.”

Zhenya from Ufa

“I grew up in a very poor family, I was left by a drinking husband with a child in his arms - so I was left completely alone. Together with a friend, we managed to come to work as nurses in Finland, and here I found my husband. We found our new job on a dating site with foreigners - at first we just went to visit, and then everything worked out by itself. I will not hide, at first there was no great love, there was basically only a calculation - to provide for myself and my child. But then I got used to my husband, Raimo, and that's how we live. I respect him very much and appreciate his tenderness and care. Endure - fall in love.”

As we can see, the motives for meeting foreigners and life stories can be very different. Someone is looking for a better life and pursues exclusively selfish interests, someone just falls in love at first sight - with a man, with a new country, with a language, culture or local cuisine. Sometimes all of these factors may be present to varying degrees.

Among the advantages of such communication is the expansion of one's horizons. A person who travels to other countries learns a lot of useful information and develops as a person. Mastering one of the foreign languages at a level sufficient for everyday communication is also a huge advantage. As one of the greats said, “you will live as many lives as you learn languages”. Having mastered one of the foreign languages, a person will be able not only to communicate in everyday life, but also often apply for a higher paid position.

Economic factors also play a huge role in meeting foreigners. It's no secret that the average salary in Russia and, say, somewhere in Norway can differ significantly. A higher standard of living makes it easier to cope with everyday troubles and provides a person with more opportunities for personal development. Pension provision in many Western countries is also much higher. High-quality medical care in Russia is still possible only for very good money, but in many Western countries, medical insurance allows you to claim a very high level of medical services. If a girl with her new foreign husband decides to take a mortgage, then somewhere in Italy they will pay 2-3% per annum, and not 9-15%, as in the Russian Federation. There are many examples of the economic benefits that can be derived from marrying abroad.

However, the decision to marry a foreigner is potentially associated with very many acute problems. Firstly, the girl finds herself in an unfamiliar social environment and is forced to assimilate. Not every person can easily learn a foreign language, even if he has an inclination for this. The social structure and traditions of another country will also differ significantly from the usual ones. Even gestures can mean something else - for example, in Bulgaria, when saying “yes”, people shake their heads from side to side, which in our country means “no”. In the United States, in many private homes, especially in southern states such as Alabama and Florida, it is not customary to take off your shoes indoors, so you will not findslippers, but very powerful vacuum cleaners will be available everywhere.

Secondly, this is a matter of religion. If the foreign husband is a Muslim, then it is better to discuss this issue in advance so that later there are no family frictions and squabbles. However, a compromise is always possible here, but for this a man must initially feel the desire to find it. Difficulties can arise even with Christianity, because a particularly zealous Catholic or Protestant can hardly understand and accept his Orthodox bride. Moreover, not everything will go smoothly if one of the partners turns out to be a believer, and the other an atheist.

Climate and food is another story. If a girl has lived all her life, for example, in Murmansk, then it will be quite unusual for her to roast all the time in the sun somewhere in the suburbs of Madrid. Although a young organism tolerates such a change in climate relatively easily, and in some cases it may even be beneficial. As for food, in many foreign countries you simply will not find some traditional Russian products, such as buckwheat or even herring and black bread. In general, the hotter the climate in a given country, the more vigorous and spicy the food consumed by its inhabitants will be.

In conclusion, I would like to note that each case, of course, is individual, therefore, the decision on whether or not to marry a foreigner should be made by the girl herself. In some cases, the pluses may well exceed the minuses, and a new, strong cell of society will be created. The main thing is to make this decisioncarefully and deliberately, and not to cut off the shoulder.