2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21
How to communicate with a child, Gippenreiter Yu. B. reveals in the pages of his book, which has gained popularity among parents around the world.
The main thing in communicating with a child is unconditional acceptance and unconditional, unconditional love. It is unconditional, i.e. "just like that", just the way it is and only for what it is. To learn how to communicate precisely from the point of view of a loving and accepting parent, and not an indignant and expressing claims, to help find a solution to the problem without putting pressure on the child, to teach to bear some responsibility for the consequences of such, Yu. Gippenreiter suggests.
According to the author, when expressing dissatisfaction with any actions of a child, one can discuss and criticize only actions and deeds, as well as their consequences, but in no case the child himself. Andbe sure to emphasize that his action upset you, but this did not affect your attitude towards the child, but only greatly upset you. Those. even blaming the actions of the child, we let him know that he is still important and valuable to us, says Julia Gippenreiter. You should constantly communicate with the child, discuss everything that interests him, speak on any topic, openly and confidentially. However, not only the child, but also the parent is not always ready for this.
Listen to hear
So how to communicate with a child? Gippenreiter Yu. B. advises you to master the technique of "active listening", which allows you to establish contact with the interlocutor and show that his problems are close to you, that you understand him and empathize. It is described in detail in the book by Yu. Gippenreiter “Communicate with a child. How?" According to the author, building the right dialogue and setting the child up for communication are the first steps towards solving the problem.
Another technique that allows you to decide how to communicate with a child, Gippenreiter Yu. B. calls the method "I - messages". With its help, you can express your attitude, namely your feelings about the current conflict situation, without giving an assessment to the actions of the interlocutor. An example of "I - messages" is the phrase "I was very upset because of today's quarrel" instead of "You - messages" "You behaved disgustingly, and I was upset." "I - messages", according to the author, do not blame, but only express your attitude to what happened, which is important in communicating with any person, and even more so with a child, teenager. Thanks to this method of communication, the child’s self-esteem does not suffer, he is not offended.self-esteem and no defensive backlash.
Theory and practice
And how to motivate a child to something, overcome resistance without breaking it and without crushing parental authority, how to find a common language with a "difficult" teenager, overcome alienation and isolation? The book contains dozens of practical tips and real stories that clearly illustrate the solution to many typical situations. After each section, homework is given to practice one or another method of communication. Doing them will allow you to master practical techniques and retrieve them from the nooks and crannies of memory at the right moment.
To the question: "How to communicate with a child?" Gippenreiter Yu. B. does not provide a single correct answer. She offers to think, improve, empathize, learn to think outside the box, accept the child unconditionally and, first of all, remember that he is a beloved, dear and infinitely dear person to you.
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