How to raise a child without screaming and punishment. Secrets of education

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

Raising kids without screams, threats and blows is probably what every mother dreams about so much. Every woman wants to learn this. Today we will learn how to grow a personality. Education without screaming, swearing, beating, punishment is possible, and all the secrets and subtleties of this process are outlined in this article. On the part of parents, only attention is needed and, of course, the use of all methods. And then they will succeed in shaping the personality of their daughter or son.

Three pillars on which the correct process of influencing the baby is built

The first thing parents think about when they say: raising a child is punishment, and their form can be different. For example, a ban on playing at the computer, watching TV, determining the crumbs in the corner. Although many mothers and fathers know that this is not the right way, and they try to change something, but as soon as their child does everything wrong again, the problem remainsagain unresolved. And the trick is that they do not know how to properly raise a child without such unpleasant and undesirable measures. However, it is actually very simple.

Features of raising children without punishment and screaming come down to the following basics:

1. Personal example.
2. Explanations.
3. Demonstration of emotions.

Personal example

How to raise children without screaming and punishment if the kid imitates the actions of his parents and repeats bad words and actions after them? To begin with, mom and dad must realize that they are not just an example for their sons and daughters, an ideal to strive for. The child constantly observes how parents behave at home, among friends, how they communicate with each other and other people, how they eat, relax, etc.

And all the actions performed by dad and mom help the baby to see the big picture and understand: what is good and what is not and how to behave in different situations.

Before punishing or scolding a child for, for example, sitting on a pot of toys for a long time, dad should think about how much time it takes him to do this and whether he takes a newspaper, crossword puzzles with him to the restroom. Mom, for example, should not criticize the baby for watching TV for a long time if she herself spends her days in front of the blue screen. And these are just two examples, and so it is necessary to draw a parallel in all other situations, and only when parents understand and begin to correct their mistakes, they can begin education without punishment. Secrets of educationin fact, they are not some kind of mystery or riddle. Everything basically lies in the behavior and actions of mom and dad, so you need to start with yourself.

Explanations

How to raise a child without screaming and punishment, if, for example, he deliberately threw your phone into the water or accidentally took the tablet, dropped it and it cracked? In fact, the culprit in this situation is not the child, but mom or dad. Of course, things are already broken and there is no way to fix them, but if you value them, then why was your boy or girl able to easily take them? You just need to hide such items away from children, and then many problems will be solved.

And the second point - how to raise a child without punishing him for such a seemingly serious offense? You just need to talk to your baby and explain that there are things that he should not touch, even if he really wants to. That the parents worked for a very long time, got tired, in order to buy this or that item for the house. And you need to talk with the baby calmly, without screaming, tantrums, and you yourself will be surprised how this will affect the child. After all, mom or dad talks to him like an adult, which means he will try to behave properly and next time he will not go where he doesn’t need to.

Demonstration of emotions

Showing your true feelings is the most acceptable punishment without shouting and reproaching. How to raise a child in this case, if he does not understand your words and only putting him in a corner or screaming is now working? In fact, in most cases it will be more effectivetell the baby that he upset you a lot, and now you are offended by him. This will be a better option than using your usual methods of punishment. The kid will really understand what he did to you badly and the next time he will think before repeating his trick again. But parents should not forget to praise their boy or girl if he or she corrected the situation, asked for forgiveness. After all, this is also a very important point in education.

Demonstration of emotions will be relevant specifically for dads, because they mostly talk about the fact that men do not cry and should not show their touching feelings. However, how to raise children without screaming and punishment, and even without showing their feelings? It's impossible. Emotions play an important role in the formation of personality without the use of physical retribution and other sanctions.

Secrets about how to raise a child without screaming: briefly about the main thing

1. If such a strong and harsh sound of voice is justified, then the parent should take into account that a child under three years old will not understand such a reaction and will consider this acceptable behavior.

2. If the baby stubbornly does his own thing, then try to explain to him in a different way, show him with examples that he will understand.

3. How to raise a child without screaming and punishment, if this sharp sound of a voice comes from the internal problems of a father or mother? The parent needs to seek help from a psychologist, and he will certainly help to cope with this situation. After all, using a cry, you only increase the abyss betweenmyself and a child.

4. It is necessary to distinguish between a raised tone and a hysterical one. An angry intonation will let the child know what he did wrong, and give him a chance to explain everything and correct the mistake. But the cry will only frighten your child, and the baby may even have a fright, panic, he will start to cry. And even after he calms down, he still won't be able to understand what happened.

5. Screaming at a child for a trifling offense is fundamentally wrong. The baby may decide that this is the norm in communication and will soon behave in the same way.

6. Try not to use such a strong and harsh sound of voice when communicating with your family members. How to raise a child without using such a line of behavior? A calm tone, a firm stance, the ability to make concessions - exactly what you need. We must not forget that crying affects the nervous system, and it is also necessary to remember: such a measure inevitably leads to cancer, asthma and other dangerous diseases.

How to raise a child without screaming and punishment: ideas and secrets for parents

The following tips will fit and they will help the child become obedient, non-capricious and cultured:

1. Leadership installation.

2. Determining the boundaries of acceptable and unacceptable behavior.

3. Compliance with the rules.

4. Reward methods.

5. Teaching responsibility.

6. Ignoring tantrums.

Setting the primacy

In a family, the leader in relations with the baby should definitely be a mother ordad, and the child is a follower, and in no case vice versa. If the baby already at the age of 3 or 4 imposes its desires on its parents, then it means that it has been spoiled. And while it's not too late, mom and dad should try to correct the situation, so that later they don't take it out on the child and not use force, rudeness and screams against him.

From the age of three, boys and girls should know that not always parents can meet them halfway, so it is necessary to teach them to correctly assess the situation and not sit on the head of an adult.

How to raise a baby without punishment? Initially, it is necessary at an early age (1, 5 - 2 years) to set the right priorities in the relationship between mom, dad and child.

Defining the boundaries of forbidden and unacceptable behavior

How to properly form a child's personality so that the child will forever understand how you can and cannot behave? We need to set clear boundaries between prohibited and non-prohibited behavior.

Logic, consistency - the principles that parents should follow when they want to raise a toddler without spanking with a belt and other methods.

If, for example, yesterday it was allowed to pull the cat's tail, then today and tomorrow it is also possible. Otherwise, the kids will be confused, bewildered and start to deliberately magic.

Clear definition of prohibitions makes life easier for the baby, and their cancellation for a while only complicates it.

To understand what behavior is acceptable and what is not, you need to focus on personal comfort. If your baby's actions are unpleasant to you(for example, the baby begins to jump on his father's stomach and the longer he jumps, the more painful it becomes for the father), they cause discomfort, it must be limited, that is, it is forbidden to do this. However, in no case do not shout: "It is impossible!" with a crooked face, but distract the child, explain to him that his father is in pain, and then your child will understand everything and stop doing it.

Keeping the rules

Prohibitions and encouragement are the two main points that must be followed by parents.

With the help of the rules, the father and mother do not allow the baby to perform dangerous and forbidden actions, and thanks to stimulation, encouragement, they raise the child correctly, acceptable.

For example, if a son wishes good night and good morning to his family, then this is good and then he can be encouraged with a smile, a kind word, a kiss.

But if he falls to the floor, knocks with his feet, then such behavior should in no case be encouraged: you need to leave, leaving the boy himself or forcibly put him on his feet, put him on a bicycle - that is, show that it will be like Mom thinks it's right.

Taking responsibility

How to raise a child without screaming and punishment, so that he understands that his bad deeds can lead to bad consequences? It is necessary to accustom him to responsibility and thus the baby will realize his importance, he will know that a lot depends on him too.

Often, a mother justifies children's misdeeds by saying that her son or daughter still does not understand, and therefore does not bear fortheir behavior no obligations. And this is a vivid example of the wrong upbringing of a child, because soon you will not do without punishment.

The sense of responsibility is perceived by the baby when mom and dad do not interfere and do not stick their noses everywhere they don’t need to (for example, they clean up after their son or daughter after he or she has played).

Therefore, in order to raise a child without screaming and punishment, then do everything possible so that your child cleans up after himself: if you make a mess in the kitchen, then let him clean up after himself; scattered the toys - then he puts them in a box. And mom can only help a little, but in no case do the work for him.

Ignoring tantrums

Our children are so smart that from a young age they begin to manipulate their parents. This way of managing a mother is good if it is directed to the good. But if children's manipulations are aimed at subjugating an adult, then they should simply be ignored. Otherwise, it will not be the upbringing of the child, but of his parents.

In our society, it is impossible to achieve something with a tantrum or a scream. Therefore, ignoring these manifestations of childish egoism, parents thereby help their child develop, learn to navigate.

If mom is wrong

There are times when parents also sin and sometimes behave in the wrong way. For example, a mother, for no reason at all, fell on a child at the moment when he needed to be pitied, or, for example,hit him and now she blames herself for it. And the kids remember such situations very well, and the task of the parent at this moment is to behave correctly. Namely, you need to admit your mistakes and apologize to the baby. It is necessary to explain to him what exactly you were angry about and be sure to then ask for his forgiveness. And do not think that by asking for an apology, you will drop your authority in front of the baby. On the contrary, this way you will show the right line of behavior and next time, if the son or daughter behaves incorrectly, he or she will also ask for forgiveness.

Now you know how to raise a child without shouting and punishment, you have understood the main secrets and principles of this difficult teaching. We learned that a personal example, explaining and showing one's emotions are the main keys to successful personality formation. And no matter what terrible act your child commits - do not rush to put him in a corner or use force against him - first understand yourself, with the situation, analyze everything thoroughly and you will surely be able to get out of the situation correctly and show your baby a great example.