We live with my husband as neighbors - what to do?

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

As the classic said: all families are unhappy in their own way. Features of relationships affect the behavior of partners, their values and habits. You are in a difficult situation, which you describe to your friends like this: do we live with my husband as neighbors? Something urgently needs to be done about this. Find tips below.

Strong relationships are constant work

People love to receive dividends, but rarely want to work for the reward to be well deserved. It is difficult to do something if you do not see the result of your actions in the moment. This is how it turns out that you live soul to soul with your husband, and then look, and the person next to you has changed. It seems nothing happened, you live as usual, but something goes wrong. If you let the relationship take its course, then do not be surprised that in the near future you will find yourself in a situation that will be characterized by the phrase: we live with my husband as neighbors.

In order not to eliminate the consequence of the problem, it is necessary not to allow the causes of the discord in relations. Start by warming up your feelings. Constantly work to ensure that your husband does not grow cold towards you. Go to the cinema, arrangeromantic dates at home and don't turn the relationship into a routine. It will ruin your life if joint walks are commonplace for you, and not a holiday. The love that you felt at the beginning of a relationship can be maintained on an ongoing basis, for this both partners must make considerable efforts.

Talk more

A friend complains to you: we live with her husband as neighbors. Advise the girl to communicate more with her missus. The problem with many couples is that they don't talk much. Living together not only kills romance, but it can also deprive people of topics for conversation. In the morning, the husband and wife go to work, in the evening they return home, share the events of the day, and then go to different rooms. Former lovers stop sharing plans, dreams and hopes with each other. They believe that it is stupid to initiate a soul mate in them. But if this is not done, the relationship will deteriorate very quickly. A couple that doesn't trust each other is bound to fall apart.

Be sure to provoke your husband to be frank. Ask a man what he thinks about, what he dreams about. Members of the same family should have common plans. So at your leisure you can start planning the weekend, the month and the coming year. A written joint future helps people realize the role of a loved one in their lives.

Pay attention to your husband

Before marriage, girls can ex alt a man and mentally put him on a pedestal. After marriage, the situation changes. womanthere is confidence that her husband will not go anywhere, so she stops idolizing him. The man is surprised at the sharp cooling, but still perceives it as another round of the development of relations.

The situation changes when a child appears in the family. A woman spends all her free time with her child. There is no time for my husband. This situation does not suit a man, at first he will be jealous of the girl, but not having achieved reciprocity, he will go looking for love on the side. So several months will pass unnoticed, and after them the woman will complain to her mother: we live with her husband as neighbors. The lady will not admit her guilt. She takes care of the child, which does not suit her husband. And the fact that the man was left alone and he lacks warmth and affection, the woman simply will not understand.

Go see a psychologist

People rarely try to understand their motivation and their aspirations. Often they are not able to argue their own actions and, as a result, they cannot predict in advance what this or that action will lead to. Do you live with your husband as neighbors? What to do in such a situation?

If partners cannot understand the reason for the cooling of their feelings, then they need to contact a psychologist. The specialist will be able to help the family if both partners seek to somehow correct the situation. If a woman drags her by force on psychotherapy and her husband for a consultation, the procedure will not bring any benefits. Relationships are work in which both partners are directly involved. It is impossible to ignite love unilaterally.

Respect your husband's interests

People are often misunderstood. But when such clashes occur in the family - it's scary. Partners must respect each other and, if not share interests, then at least approve them. Have you met families in which the husband and wife live as neighbors? The problem with such couples is that the woman does not support the interests of her husband. For example, a man may have a passion for designing or for collecting electronics. If a woman itchs every day over her lover's ear that his stupid hobby takes time, money and brings nothing to the family, then a scandal cannot be avoided. You need to understand that every person needs an outlet. For some, it becomes computer games, for some, reading, and for some, arts and crafts. The wife must learn to share the interests of her husband. If this does not work out, then just respect the man’s occupation and support his desire to fulfill himself in the chosen field.

Don't quarrel for no reason

Many women are accustomed to proving themselves right by shouting or crying. When the argument ends in a dispute, the girl changes the tactics of the discussion. She raises her voice and begins to put pressure on the man with authority, or manipulates the guy's mind with the help of tears. Such scandals lead to the alienation of partners. If at first quarrels ended in passionate reconciliation, then after the wedding, relations change. They become less passionate, but more trust and respect.

You live with your husbandhow are the neighbors? It's time to urgently change the situation. Think about it, how often do you yell at a man? Every day, three times a week? Stop making a fuss. Learn to resolve disputes peacefully. Can't justify your position? Read more, expand your vocabulary and train your eloquence. The skill of calm dialogue will help you normalize relations not only with your husband, but also with everyone around you.

Give the man more freedom

Why are girls jealous of their husbands? Because women have trust issues. The more a person winds himself up, the more she believes in a story invented by herself. And the more often a wife reproaches her husband for infidelity, the more reasons a man has to justify undeserved reproaches. Most often, wives push their husbands to cheat on their own.

Your husband is cheating? You live like neighbors, what to do with the problems that have piled up? You need to change your attitude towards life. Cheating on those girls who deserve it. The more the lady puts pressure on the man, the more he wants to escape from captivity. No need to limit the freedom of your husband. A person will not leave you if you are really dear to him. And keeping a person nearby who always looks to the left does not make sense. Stop controlling the life of your faithful and do not bother the guy with eternal questions. Let the person behave the way they want. This tactic will help you maintain a good relationship for years to come.

Do not take quarrels out of the family

Grievances and misunderstandings people used to accumulate inyourself. If you do not accept the situation and do not let go of the problem, it will come out someday. Try not to be offended by the person and talk to your husband about all the situations in which you feel discomfort. Some women are afraid to speak frankly with a man and turn to their friends for advice. This is not worth doing. If a man finds out that all friends are aware of the problems in your family, he will be unpleasant, hurt and offended. The problems of two people should be solved by them, and not by someone else. If you do not turn to your soulmate for requests and advice, then soon you will live with your husband as neighbors.

What to do? The psychologist's advice is very simple. Was there a fight or dispute? Resolve the issue right away. Don't complain about the quarrel to your friends. During the pause you took to cool down, think about the situation, and then discuss it with your husband. A man will be grateful that you are looking for help and support from him.

Be honest

Frankness in conversation is the key to the success of any normal relationship. Do you live like neighbors with your husband? The psychologist's advice would be this: every time you want to say the phrase "you must", replace it with the phrase "I want." Then you will immediately decrease the number of reproaches that you wanted to address to your husband. Remember that no one owes you anything. The man agreed to connect his life with you, but he did not agree to listen to your tantrums and claims. Moreover, he did not agree to be indebted to you all his life because you deigned to marry him.

The secret of phrase substitution is that a woman stops thinking from the position that her husband is her slave. The lady begins to realize that her desires may be too high. If she approaches her chosen one during the day and says “I want you to hang a picture”, “I want you to walk the dog”, then she will soon realize that the man is not such a loafer as she thought in the house from a lot depends on him. A simple restructuring of consciousness helps a woman appreciate her man more.

Live for yourself, not for your children

If everything in your life is really bad, and you do not know how to live on, then you should get a divorce. Have you heard the phrase: we live with my husband as neighbors for the sake of children? There is nothing worse in life than saying something like that. Children will never appreciate the life of a mother laid on the altar of their happiness. A child who grew up in prosperity, but in a family where parents do not love each other, will be much more unhappy than a person who did not have much, but saw his mother happy. Therefore, never put personal happiness lower than anyone else's. You came into this world to make it better and brighter. If your husband turned out to be an unworthy type and you can’t establish a relationship in any way, leave. You can still find a decent person who will make you happy.