The funniest wedding toasts

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

If you are invited to a wedding celebration or an anniversary of marriage, then you probably think about what words to congratulate the newlyweds. At the banquet, parting, solemn or touching speeches are most often heard. And you should look into this article if you have a desire to make witty, funny toasts. It is customary to give gifts at a wedding, so you can easily beat a present by adding a bit of humor to your speech. So, more.

Compliance with the conditions

Cool congratulations should cause a smile, laughter and create a fun, relaxed holiday atmosphere. None of the guests should feel offended, therefore, it is necessary to know the composition of the guests and not to raise topics that cause unpleasant associations or memories in someone. There are three main rules to follow:

1. All funny wedding toasts are short. This is due to the fact that during the feast it is difficult for guests and newlyweds for a long timemaintain voluntary attention.
2. Acting and speech - rehearsed. Poor diction, poor audibility, or inappropriate intonation may not make sense of the joke.
3. Cool congratulations - appropriate. A parable, poem or anecdote should be friendly and evoke only positive emotions in the heroes of the occasion and guests.

Funny wedding toasts require preparation, but they will definitely be remembered for a long time by both the participants of the banquet and the heroes of the occasion.

Toasts in the form of a parable

A small story with a deep moral meaning is the best option if you want to say a wish at the beginning of the celebration. It can be used by the parents of the newlyweds, witnesses and other close relatives. Inviting you to tell toasts at the wedding in your own words (funny anecdotes, parables and short wishes), let's start with edifying stories:

• Think about how the couple goes through the first year? He speaks, she listens. And second? She speaks, he listens. And from the third year, monotony begins: both of them are already talking, but only the neighbors are listening. So let's drink to the fact that the newlyweds break this tradition and listen to each other all their lives, as at the beginning of their joint journey!
• On the first of September, the parents took their son to the first grade, and in the evening he attacked them almost with his fists: "Why didn't you explain right away that this bagpipe would drag on for 11 years?" Therefore, we should warn the heroes of the occasion today: "Your bagpipes are onall my life!". And you should raise your glasses so that it is only a joy for both of you!

Wedding toasts: cool and funny jokes

They are passed from person to person, their meaning is in an interesting denouement, which, as a rule, causes laughter. The use of jokes during a banquet is appropriate for those people who know how to tell them. This requires special acting skills:

• The great Spanish writer claimed: "Lovers wear special glasses that allow them to see gold instead of copper, we alth instead of poverty. Drops of fire seem to them like pearls." It makes sense to raise glasses so that in the house of our newlyweds all this can be seen with the naked eye.
• Met two old friends who had not seen each other for a long time. Asks one another: "Have you been married for a long time?" And he replies: “Yes, I don’t know what to say. Everything depends on the wife. Sometimes I feel like a newlywed, and sometimes it seems that I have been married for 40 years.” So let's drink to the fact that our newlyweds always live like they were married yesterday!

Short Wishes

Wedding toasts, cool, short and funny, can also be in the form of laconic wishes. They are appropriate if quite a bit of time is allocated for congratulations with a large number of guests. Here are some options:

• Friends! I propose to shout: "Bitter!". And raise your glasses to the kiss that men came up with, finding no other way to closebeloved woman's mouth.
• We offer to drink for mathematics in a relationship. For the addition, with the help of which your married couple was formed. For the subtraction that excluded you from the ranks of bachelors. For dividing all the problems in half. For the multiplication of the family with the help of the birth of children.
• We often have mixed feelings. For example, when the mother-in-law flies into the abyss in your car. I propose to raise glasses so that they never visit us!

Funny wedding toasts in verse

Wishes in poetic form are very well received. You can either use the ones already published or show your creativity. The main thing is that it should be humorous and carry a positive attitude.

We wish you he alth and a rich life, How much your salary will help you with this.

But, however, we always miss her, So shake the ancestors, let them add!

Parents have now doubled, Come to them, stay longer.

And if everything comes to your diapers, Give birth to more boys, girls!

And if this kindergarten bothers you, Give it to grandmas - they will raise!

But we wish more than the other, however, So that marriage would not happen in your family!

Congratulatory quatrains

What are the most common wedding toasts? Short, in verse, where the main idea fits into four lines. This is due to time constraints. Therefore, it is necessary to choose capacious statements andnecessarily with a dose of humor.

For happiness, the path usually leads uphill, So conquer this height!

And do not let disagreements and quarrels

Heartbeats break the beauty!

We will add a tip to your gift.

He has a secret of lasting love:

With this money you will buy a bed, And don't sleep separately until old age!

I'll raise a glass to he alth, And I'll tell you everything about immunity.

Hugs, caresses, lips and warm hands

Pills replace half a kilo.

If it's an anniversary

A funny wedding anniversary toast will make the event more heartfelt and give guests the necessary lightness and positive attitude to communicate. The following option for the 10th anniversary is possible, for example:

Husband returns from a long business trip. His wife happily meets him at the door, but he calmly puts down his suitcase and goes into the room, not noticing the sparkle in his wife's eyes. She asks offendedly: "You don't even want to kiss me?". To this, in response, he receives a whole rebuff: "Why should we arrange orgies? We have been married for 10 years." I propose to raise glasses to the orgy that we can all see now! Bitter

A toast that fits any anniversary date can also be universal:

Your marriage has lasted for so many years thanks to the observance of the main rule: marriage is a commonwe alth of two. At the same time, one of them is always right under any circumstances. And the second one isthe male. I propose to drink to this hard rule

You can offer an option in poetic form:

Your couple is an example for us, For your advice I will drink:

So that love does not die, I have to… do the dishes now!

Toast in honor of the bride

There are situations when it is necessary to raise a glass not for a couple, but separately for the bride or groom. It could be a commandment toast. For example, like this:

Wife! Grant your spouse the honorable and important right - to bring great money into the house, and even the hard and overwhelming work - how to spend it - take it upon yourself. Be honest with your spouse. Let him believe that he has a crown on his head and that he is called Father Tsar. It is enough for you to know alone that they call that crown a heel

Funny wedding toasts in the form of a joke are appropriate in this case too. We offer one of them:

I would like to raise a glass to the resourcefulness of our bride. She always knew how to put anyone in a dead end. I’ll tell you a little secret about how our (groom’s name) proposed to her. He was so worried that he decided to take this step only by phone: "Olya, I suggest you marry. For me. Do you agree?" And our Olenka, without hesitation, answered "Yes!" And only then she timidly asked: "Who is this on the phone?"

Toast in honor of the groom

In a comic form, it is easier to convey to the groom the wish of his chosen one. So, from the side of relatives and girlfriends of the bride, such funny wedding toasts for the newly-made spouse are possible:

• On the way tobanquet we met a sad flower shop saleswoman. She alone is grieving about your wedding, because (name of the groom) has been her best client for a year, buying the best bouquets for her beloved. So let's drink to ensure that this day is not sad for anyone. Raising the mood of the saleswoman depends entirely on the groom.
• I would like to drink to the fact that our fiancé loves literature and reads not only the ingenious "Moo-mu". So that it doesn’t turn out like in a joke: “Are you ready to act like Romeo, who loves his Juliet?”. And the answer is only: "M-mmm." "Are you capable of being jealous of your Desdemona, like Othello?" And again "M-mmm." And when asked to remember a quote from a favorite work, he can only say: "If you bark, I'll drown you!".

In honor of the parents of the newlyweds

At the wedding celebration, you should definitely say kind words to the parents of both the groom and the bride. It is also appropriate to raise a toast in their honor. In a joking manner, it is appropriate to pronounce it for those who are well acquainted with these people:

• Imagine the conversation: "Darling, I have to tell you that there will be three of us soon." - "How happy I am, dear." - "I believed that you would be delighted with the arrival of my mother!" I propose to raise a glass to the mother-in-law, whose arrival the son-in-law really rejoices!
• I want to raise a glass to the parents of our charming bride. They raised a daughter who is a pleasure to look at. No wonder such an enviable groom hunted her!

Can be transferredall and verses:

You take care of your son-in-law from now on, And do not scold, do not scold, but praise!

You, mother-in-law, treat you more often, And father-in-law, pour a full glass of wine!

I would like to believe that the readers were able to either choose something suitable for themselves, or adopt an idea to please everyone at the celebration with their creativity.