2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2024-01-07 12:45
Parents always want their children to be happy. But sometimes they try too hard to bring up the ideal. Children are taken to different sections, to circles, classes. The kids do not have time to walk and relax. In the eternal race for knowledge and success, parents forget to simply love their child and listen to his opinion. And if you look at the family through the eyes of a child, what happens?
View from below
The ideas of adults about the family are different from the children's view. The family through the eyes of a child looks different. A young creature does not always understand that parents need to earn money in order to buy a "vital" toy or go to the next master class.
Children want adults to pay more attention to them, and parents want to relax in the armchair after work, and not play catch-up or hide-and-seek. Different priorities and valuesseparate children from adults. And if the parents do not notice in time that a split has occurred, they will not be able to do anything when the crack turns into an abyss.
How to understand your child? Parents should be psychologists. They are obliged to be interested in the wishes of the baby, and not to impose their opinion on him. The process of education should be individual. It is impossible to bring up all children according to the template, hoping to get the perfect result.
Naughty child
All children are born loving and kind creatures. Toddlers are ready for communication and endless games. Children are like sponges, absorbing everything they see and hear. The family through the eyes of a child is a role model. Babies want to be like their dads and moms. But if adults do not pay enough attention to their child, then the child can get out of hand.
The baby will be capricious for any reason, will often be naughty and indulge. Sometimes a child can behave too aggressively. Parents will shout at the child, try to reason with him. But that won't help. Why?
One must always try to enter into the position of the child, to understand the reason for his behavior. Pranks and pranks are a way for a baby to attract attention. If the child broke or broke something, then the parents will immediately be there. Yes, at first adults can scream, but when the baby bursts into tears, he will be caressed, and the moralizing lecture will end. After such antics, adults will play with the child, feeling guilty for the recent outburst of anger.
Closed children
Babies can grow up sociable and kind, or they can be taciturn and shy. Someone might think that the child has such a character, and by nature he is an introvert. This is not true. Any child loves attention from an adult. But if attention is expressed in constant reproaches and criticism, the baby will not like it.
The child will quickly understand: in order not to receive punishment, you need to hide the traces of your fault from your parents. The kid will not trust adults, and, therefore, will not trust them. Parents will lose authority in the eyes of the baby. If the child is lucky, he will be able to find love and support in the form of a kindergarten teacher. It is from her that the baby will take an example. A woman will become a child's best friend, support and support. Parents will only be surprised how a good and active child in kindergarten can be gloomy and taciturn at home.
Obediant child
Parents always want their baby to grow up he althy and smart. But sometimes in this pursuit, young mothers are too zealous. A loving mother can overprotect the baby, not giving him the opportunity to do something on his own. And if the child takes the initiative, a portion of censure will await him.
The child will quickly get used to the fact that adults always decide everything for him. It turns out that it is easier to obey their authoritative opinion, because they are so smart. The baby will not take the initiative and will obey any request of family members.
From the outside it may seem that the child is very good, sweet and obedient. In fact, the baby willsuffer from hopelessness. From childhood, he will not have any desires and aspirations. He will never become a leader in a company or an authority in a family. A child will reproach his parents all his life for ruining in him a craving for knowledge and a love for simple joys.
Family problems
For parents, the child will always be a stupid little creature that does not understand anything. But if adults look at the family through the eyes of a child, they will be very surprised.
The baby always considers himself the center of the universe. It seems to him that everything that happens in the world is done for him. Therefore, if adults quarrel, the child immediately thinks that it is because of him.
Studying the family through the eyes of a child is quite problematic. Children are not always able to express their thoughts, and even more so feelings. Toddlers from the first years of life to adolescence believe that parents exist solely to bring joy to their person. And, if adults are dissatisfied with something, then you need to look for the problem in yourself.
Dad yelled at mom? The kid was upset and began to think what he was guilty of. Mom kicked dad out of the house? The child is at a loss, how could dad leave, did he stop loving them? Any quarrel between parents is very painful for the baby. The more often adults swear, the more complexes they hang on their child.
Questionnaire for children
In kindergarten, teachers pay great attention to the mental he alth of their wards. Specialistsmany methods are being developed. The family through the eyes of a child can be seen with a simple questionnaire. How might he look? The teacher asks the kid questions, and he quickly and frankly says what came to his mind:
- "I think our family…". Ideally, the baby should say that she is happy, cheerful, friendly. Or any other positive epithet. In this case, we can assume that the child is comfortable to exist surrounded by the closest adults.
- "My mother…". Beautiful, smart, caring. Such a simple definition suggests that the child is very attached to the mother. And that's okay. A mother for a child is the main person on the planet. The kid should describe it with the most beautiful adjectives that are in his vocabulary.
- "My dad…". Brave, courageous, funny. This definition helps educators understand that the father is the authority for the child. Dad is not always the closest person, but the baby should love a man, not be afraid of him.
- "I love my parents because…". That they love me, they play with me, they entertain me. The child must understand why he loves his parents. If the baby finds it difficult to answer, then family relationships leave much to be desired.
- "I want parents to…". They spent more time with me, bought me toys, took me to the park. Such desires are quite normal. No matter how wonderful the parents are, the child will find something to complain about. But when the baby wants his parents to love him, then you need to seriously think aboutfamily relationships.
Questionnaire for parents
Educators should hold parent-teacher meetings. Such events should be arranged in the form of a conversation. A family through the eyes of a child and a family through the eyes of an adult can be different.
How well parents understand and know their child is very easy to find out. You need to give adults and children the same questionnaires and see if the answers match. The world of the family through the eyes of a child rests on what the baby loves. Adults should be well aware of the preferences of their child. What would a list of questions look like? Something like this:
- Everything you love: an activity, a color, a dish, a thing, a holiday.
- Best friend.
- A cherished wish.
- Best cartoon.
Pattern analysis
A happy family through the eyes of a child is a tiny world where the baby is loved and praised as a treasure. Finding out the relationship between the baby and adults is very easy. Parents should give the child the task of drawing a family. How to correctly interpret the result of a child's activity?
- Quality. The child will draw all family members one by one. If the child's relationship with adults is good, then the baby will place himself in the center. Parents should stand next to him, on both sides. Grandparents, aunts, uncles and pets can go further. If a child has not drawn someone, it is foolish to think that he simply forgot. This means that the person who "did not fit" into the sheet does not have any effect on the baby.
- Size. The more people in the picture, the more he has authority forchild. If the kid drew himself as the largest, it means that his ego is inflated, and the parents, at the first call, are used to fulfilling all the orders of the baby.
- Color. Bright colors show the child's good attitude towards family members. If one of the adults is painted black, this is an indicator of the child's personal antipathy towards the adult.
- Distance. If family members are located close to each other, then the child believes that he has a good relationship with adults. Do any of your relatives stand alone? This means that the child does not like the person.
Prudent parenting
Parents should learn to look at the family through the eyes of a child. This rule should apply not only to the mother and father, but also to the next of kin.
In order for a child to grow in love, one must not forget to show it from time to time. It is vital for a baby to know that he is loved. How to raise a child so that he grows up as a full-fledged personality?
It's simple. It is necessary not to spoil him, but not to deprive him either. Be fair, punish for deeds and reward for achievements. And don't limit creativity and always give a chance to speak.
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