What attracts girls to guys? Probably, there is no such young person who would not ask this question at least once in his life. Most young men are sure that their appearance is important. So they try to look as "cool" as possible.
However, in reality, how the guys look is secondary. Of course, facial features and figure should not cause disgust. But what attracts girls in guys is not at all the appearance, but the manner of communication. Young ladies should be interested next to young men. If a girl is pleased to talk with a young man, then she will go on a date with him with great pleasure.
It is not for nothing that the people have a saying that men love with their eyes, and women with their ears. Therefore, if a guy wants to be popular with girls or conquer only one of them, he needs to learn how to flirt. This skill is usefulonly in direct communication, but also in correspondence.
What you need to know about flirting?
A young man who is about to master the science of seduction should remember a couple of simple axioms:
- there are no identical women in the world;
- there are no universal flirting techniques.
In other words, there is no single pattern or set of rules to follow when dealing with girls. What interests one may well be disappointing and repulsive to another.
Accordingly, the main rule of flirting is attention to the girl. There are no insignificant trifles, absolutely everything is important. A true master of flirting does not just notice the reactions of a woman, at a certain stage of communication he already easily predicts them.
What to look for when texting?
Of course, how to flirt with a pen girlfriend has its own specifics. After all, it is impossible to evaluate postures, gestures, facial expressions. What should you pay attention to?
The vast majority of young men are sure that they should follow the speed of the girl's answers. There is a certain amount of truth in this belief, because if the interlocutor is interested in communication, then she answers almost instantly. However, in fact, the speed of answers is not an indicator of interest in either the conversation or the guy himself. A girl can answer quickly only because at the moment she is bored and has nothing to do. Long pauses between messages may indicate that the interlocutor is busy, and not aboutthat she does not like the topic of conversation or the young man himself.
So how do you flirt with a pen girlfriend if you don't pay much attention to the speed of her answers? What shows interest and what shows indifference? You can understand how much a girl is involved in communication by the manner of her answers and their design. The more a girl uses emoticons and stickers, the better. Of course, only if they complement sentences, not replace them.
You should also pay attention to how talkative the interlocutor is. There are not so many silent people in the world. If the girl answers rarely and laconicly, or even gets off with visual effects, then it is urgent to change the style and topic of the conversation.
How to communicate? Should I talk about myself?
There is no single template for how to flirt with a girl in a text. You need to be sensitive to the interlocutor, be attentive and focus solely on her reactions. Text flirting is like sailing a sailboat. That is, the task of the young man is to set the sails in the direction of the wind, and not against it.
Should I tell my interlocutor about myself? In how to flirt with a pen pal, the same stereotypes and psychological tricks apply as in live communication. This means that the interlocutor should speak, and the young man should listen and “taunt” to continue the conversation, noticing the girl’s fading interest in time. The specificity of correspondence is that especiallythere are usually no long monologues in it. As a rule, people exchange short messages, meaning nothing, playful phrases. Accordingly, there should be at least twice as many phrases from a girl in the chat as from a boy.
Accordingly, long stories about yourself are not appropriate. Of course, if a girl takes an interest in something, then she should answer, there is no need to make a “riddle” out of her person. However, one should not lose leadership in the dialogue. Flirting, although it implies reciprocity, but the “main role” in it is for a man. He is the seducer, not his companion.
What should you never do? Flirting Failure Example
Although it's not difficult to flirt over text, many guys make a number of mistakes at first. The most common of them is an exaggeration of one's own abilities, income and merits. Not everyone succeeds in avoiding the temptation to embellish reality. And not always a lie remains without consequences.
An example would be the following situation. The young man lied about having a car. He communicates with a girl living in the same city. And one day between them there is such a dialogue:
W: Where are you now?
M: At McD's, having lunch. We'll finish, I'll go for a ride.
F: Yes? I'm at McD too. Where's your car, dude?
The guy, of course, was very ashamed, and he stopped communicating with the girl. At the same time, it remained unknown whether his interlocutor asked where the car was parked or simplyquoted a phrase from the cult American film.
Accordingly, what should never be done when flirting over text is to embellish reality. Although the temptation to appear cool and rich is very great, the consequences of such a lie cannot be avoided.
What attracts girls in communication?
How to learn to flirt with a pen girlfriend? What to talk to her about? When to post? Do you use emoticons? What topics to choose to start a dialogue? These and many other questions concern almost all young men who spend most of their time at the computer. In fact, the ability to flirt with a pen pal is not much different from that which allows you to build live communication with the fair sex.
The conversation should not strain, cause discomfort or psychological inconvenience. Therefore, serious or specific topics should be avoided. Of course, communication should bring positive emotions.
Girls like guys who are sensitive to the mood of their interlocutors, able to both laugh and show sympathy, tact. Of course, we should not forget about compliments.
Accordingly, girls in communication are attracted by the presence of understanding on the part of the guy or the illusion of this. That is, in order to please a girl, you need to joke, be interested in her mood, tell funny news and, in general, bring positive and variety into her life. But at the same time, one must be sensitive to her worries and sorrows, be able tosympathize and comfort.
What should not be forgotten?
Flirting in correspondence with a girl saves a young man from many of the hassles that courtship requires in ordinary life. For example, he does not have to spend money on bouquets of flowers and movie tickets, visits to cafes.
However, the lack of real communication does not mean that you should forget about gallantry. You need to start everyday correspondence with a girl you already know in absentia not with the banal expression “Hello, how are you?”, But with a good morning wish, a bouquet of flowers and a cup of coffee. Of course, the bouquet and coffee are emoticons or pictures found on the Internet. After this message, you do not need to dive into correspondence, you should go about your business. A girl whose morning begins with flowers and a cup of coffee "in bed", even if not real, will look forward to the evening and will gladly begin to communicate with a young man on any topic.
How to meet a girl and start chatting with her?
In the virtual space, there are a lot of different services specializing in "arranging dating". If a young man wants to attract the attention of a girl on one of these sites, then no tricks are needed for this. It is enough just to turn to the woman you like, say hello to her and ask about something. The conversation will definitely start.
But how do you start flirting with a pen pal outside of dating sites like social media? First you need to study her interests and start visiting the pages of groups thatshe looks over. You need to put "like" marks in the same place where the girl does it. As soon as she leaves a comment under any post, it should be supported and developed. Thus, the acquaintance will start “accidentally” and logically turn into private correspondence.
The main convenience of this method is that you do not need to come up with "original" phrases and topics. Correspondence will start naturally and will not require any effort.
How to flirt with a pen girlfriend? An example of successful communication
Quite often, young men who do not have much experience in communicating with girls either in ordinary life or in the virtual space look for examples of successful dialogues and try to “copy” them. This is a pretty good way to learn how to make acquaintances and develop relationships on your own. However, we must not forget that flirting does not recognize patterns. During the conversation, you need to focus not on the “sample” of the dialogue, but on the mood and reactions of the girl.
An example of a good and simple flirt:
M: Good evening, how was your weekend?
F: Hello, how can I tell you…
M: Could it be better or worse?
F: Couldn't be so boring.
M: Well, you're not alone in this.
F: What are you? Probably went to the club himself?
M: Even two clubs, but I swear to you, I missed you very much there. Honestly.
The girl sends "laughing" emoticons and the conversation smoothly flows into a discussion of plans for the next week.
What good is this dialogue? First, it began with a polite and gallant phrase that createsthe impression of the writer as an adult and self-sufficient person, showing attention to the girl. The light irony that sounds in the next phrase “knocks down” the pessimism and apathy from the interlocutor, which her abstract answer betrays. This is followed by a provocation, ending with a veiled compliment and a hint of feelings. At the same time, the guy does not use any special tricks or “special phrases”.
How not to flirt over text? Examples of Bad Communication
Examples of flirting with a pen girlfriend can not only demonstrate how to communicate, but also demonstrate how not to do it.
Example of bad flirting:
M: Hello, how are you?
F: Going to the store.
M: What did you do yesterday? You weren't online.
F: Yes, I went to the movies.
M: And how?
F: Fine, I liked it.
M: Come on, let's write.
What's wrong with this conversation? Firstly, the guy starts it with a fairly familiar phrase that is appropriate when communicating with friends, and not with a lady of the heart. With such a greeting, he immediately psychologically assigns the girl the role of a friend, respectively, and she does not consider him as a potential gentleman. The second phrase is reminiscent of an interrogation arranged by parents for children. You can ask what the girl was doing in a more gallant manner.
With his third sentence, the guy betrays complete indifference to the interests and tastes of the interlocutor. She should have asked what movie she had seen and what she thought of it. Of course, and he gets an answer completely"template", devoid of personal coloring, emotions. And, finally, the biggest mistake of the young man is that he practically “cut off” the conversation.
This dialogue demonstrates the manner of communication of a kind of "beginning macho". The guy may not be an egotist, but is simply shy or hides his insecurities behind ostentatious bravado and stereotypical phrases “about nothing”. Such conversations never lead to a romantic relationship, as they are boring and do not suggest continuation.
What can ruin a flirtatious start?
It often happens that the correspondence that followed a successful acquaintance gradually fades away. People begin to leave messages less often, and then stop communicating altogether. Why is this happening?
Flirting is an easy and fun communication that implies mutual interest of the parties. His "worst enemies" are boredom, lack of sincerity, far-fetched phrases. This should not be forgotten when considering options for what to talk to a girl about and how to do it.