How to raise a teenager: problems, difficulties and ways to solve them. Councils of psychologists and recommendations of teachers

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

Every family knows the situation when it's time for a naughty teenager. This is the transitional age of the child. It is important not to miss it, so as not to encounter problems in more serious formats in the future. After all, I want the child to understand the events in life, perceive everything correctly and be able to use the advice of older people.

How to raise a teenager? This is the most pressing and important issue that arises in every family with children. Most often, parents begin their upbringing by explaining why the child’s behavior is wrong and how it will threaten him in the future. But in most cases, ordinary educational conversations and conversations will not give any result. And that's where the upbringing of difficult adolescence stops, because the parents think they can't fight this behavior. But who, no matter how mom and dad, should help the child and direct him in the right direction?

Shaping habits and skills

You can hear from any psychologist about how to properly educate teenagers. Most scientists have hypothesizedthat the brain of a child is very plastic. And since childhood, it will change from external events, factors. The child will adapt to this or that situation. And on the basis of this, habits and skills will be formed that are difficult to break in the future.

With age, the brain is not so plastic, but it can develop. And this is the key point that needs to be used. Therefore, it is important not to miss the moment of correcting behavior in adolescence. Indeed, sometimes it happens that this period is the last chance to create and strengthen the nervous system of a teenager, the correct manners of his behavior. All this will have an impact on the future life of your maturing child.

Sensitivity and emotionality of teenage children

The question of how to raise teenage children is asked by every ordinary parent. It is important to know that at this age children become very sensitive, prone to frequent emotional breakdowns. All this happens in their head. This is where the danger lies, because it is impossible to immediately understand how the brain actively works and what is happening there. In adolescents, the part of the brain that is responsible for emotions is activated. The matter is aggravated by the fact that the part of the brain that contributes to the adoption of sane decisions is only developing. Hence the impulsive behavior, and mood swings, and much, much more.

It is necessary to find out in advance how to properly educate teenagers,so that there are no problems later. For each child, it is necessary to select an individual approach that suits specifically his character and behavior.

Ways of nurturing impact

A child often wants to experience some kind of joy, some kind of emotion. But children do not always understand that emotions can be not only positive, but also negative. Therefore, in the case of negative feelings or a negative situation, a teenager will not be able to do the right thing. It is important for parents to know what are the ways of educating influence on children and adolescents. There are at least five different methods:

• persuasion;
• exercises and habituation;
• learning process;
• incentive method;
• be sure to monitor and evaluate behavior.

Each of these methods should be manifested by the educator, as he will influence the child in various ways. There are several important positions in pedagogy. Initially, with the help of correct speech, explanations of a particular situation are presented. After that, there is a control of how the teenager understood the words and what conclusion he makes. And in the end, you must definitely evaluate his behavior.

The first way is to convince our teenagers

Educate, understand, love - these are the three components that any parent must apply. At the time of the educational conversation, it is necessary to give such arguments that will become the main points and willkeep the teenager's attention specifically on the situation that has arisen. The method of persuasion is an opportunity to act on the mind, the mind of a young person from different sides. Here you should use various evidence, ways of explaining and suggesting your point of view. It is important to know how to nurture independence in a teenager. After all, this skill can only be taught at the stage of education. Namely, through the exercise, for example, systematically organize the implementation of various actions. Such exercises will help shape and develop personality.

Training and stimulation method

Those who are interested in the question of how to raise a teenager will be interested in learning about two more methods that will be useful in communicating with a child. Let's talk about training. The method is practically the dominant means. It can be taught through words, examples, and actions. This classification must be supplemented by methods of verification and consolidation.

The next method is stimulation. This process helps the child to realize the actions done. Stimulation will help to awaken, give impetus, give impetus to thoughts, feelings, and then the child will begin to act in the right direction.

Demonstration of love between family members

In fact, adolescent girls and boys are not much different. But there are slight inclinations and differences between them in education. There are three methods of education. The first rule is a demonstration of love. The child should feel comfort and coziness in the house. To do this, it is important to surround him not only with care, but also with love. Often in incomprehensible situations, it is important for a child to express support. Each member of the family should show tenderness and attention, as well as actively participate in the life plans of a young person. With any positive or negative event, it is important to note the child's behavior and evaluate his actions in a mild form.

Strictness in education. Should she be?

The second rule of upbringing is rigor. If you are interested in how to raise a teenager correctly, then you should not forget about severity. The child will not be able to correctly perceive instructive words if the parents do not keep external control. And it must be strictly stated. Only then is it possible for the child to manifest independence so that he can independently control his actions.

It is also necessary to follow the sequence in your actions and deeds. In the event of a repeated situation, there is no need to resort to screaming and creating an atmosphere of fear for the child. Such aggression will only close the feelings of a teenager. Control must be gradually loosened. The child must take independent steps towards the right goal. Otherwise, all controlled actions will not allow him to understand his behavior. A teenager should feel in control of his behavior, understand what he is doing right and what is not.

If you follow these three rules of upbringing, you will get an excellent result. The child should have a sense of self-regulation of their behavior. Strengthen self-control is possible by doing physical exercises. The most effective sport is considered to be a team sport - football, basketball, hockey.

Puberty

The most difficult stage in the development of a person's personality is adolescence. Every parent should know how to raise a teenager at 14. This is the period when the process of puberty takes place, physiological signs are formed, character is developed, certain emotions are manifested. The transitional age in girls begins much earlier than in boys. Therefore, when thinking about how to educate a teenager, a boy or a girl, it should be remembered that their teaching methods are slightly different. Let's talk about it in more detail.

Features and differences in the upbringing of boys and girls

The main distinguishing features are such nuances that the boy needs to be trusted, but the girl should be taken care of. If you often show love to a boy, give him tender care, then in the eyes of the child it will look as if his parents do not trust him. From the lack of faith, he will not have independence. But if a girl is given complete freedom in choosing her actions, then she may think that no one needs her and no one loves her. Your son needs to express his concern only through trust.

Feelings of a girl and a boy at an early age will also be different. This should always be taken into account. If a teenage boy has done the right thing, then his independent action must be supported. It is also imperative to motivate his act so that in the future each action is considered.

Features of educationgirls. What to consider?

Every mother should know how to raise a teenage girl. After all, a girl is a gentle creature that needs care and special attention. In any case, she will show her feelings, emotions and sometimes even tears.

Girls need to be loved and constantly show this love to them in practice, so that they feel it and understand that they are valued. Girls need approval, care and understanding. It is also especially important to help and support in difficult times. As soon as the girl feels the care directed at her, self-confidence, her actions and actions will immediately appear. And in the future it will be easy for her to cope with certain difficulties and problems.

Advice for parents

A lot has been said about how to raise a teenager. From the entire large number of recommendations, we can single out the most important criteria that every parent who has a teenager in their home should pay attention to:

1. Parents should be interested in the affairs of their child and be sure to participate in them. More specifically, help and support. This will help to control his actions and jointly overcome difficulties. If the attention and help of parents is not enough, then the child may develop low self-esteem.
2. Moms and dads should not only educate, but also listen and empathize with the child. Parents who do not have these feelings will make the child feel indifferent.
3. Dads and moms should have love and positive emotions. They areshould be shown not only to the teenager, but also to each other. If a child sees love and tenderness in the family, then he will always have positive and light emotions in his soul.
4. Recognition and approval of the actions of children by parents.
5. Trust must be shown to the child. Distrust of a teenager will lead to the fact that fear will begin to appear.
6. Parents should set a personal example for the child, which will be based on the correct behavior, committing only deliberate actions and actions.
7. Be sure to pay attention to the school life of a teenager. This is necessary so that he feels the control of his parents and fulfills his educational responsibilities to the fullest. After all, it is clear that he will need it.

We have sorted out the general tips for raising matured children. Strive to find a common language with even the most difficult teenager, and your efforts will surely be rewarded.