A man 15 years older: the psychology of relationships, the pros and cons of the age difference

2024 Author: Priscilla Miln | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 00:21

Are you confused and don't know what to do next? A girl often gets into a similar situation if her man is 15 years older. The lady begins to think whether she is doing the right thing, that she is dating a man much older than herself, and whether it is worth enduring the reproachful glances of acquaintances for the sake of true love. The problems, pros and cons of relationships in which one partner is older than the other will be discussed in detail below.

Society attitude

In society it is considered quite acceptable to meet people of different ages. When this difference is 1-5 years, no one says anything. What if the man is 15 years older? The reviews of girls who dated guys much older than themselves differ, but all the girls agree on one thing: those around them condemned them. They considered it unacceptable to live with a man who was almost the age of a father. 15 years is an abyss even in more than one generation. people of differentages rarely reach understanding. It is easier to communicate with peers, they are on the same wavelength. The older generation looks at the younger people with some disdain. Men think younger people are dumber. And society understands this very well.

It must be admitted that there are exceptions to every rule. Relations with a man 15 years older are not always condemned. Sometimes people love each other and live soul to soul. But this happens only if one of the partners is developed beyond his years or remains a child in his soul. But even such relationships will be condemned. Why? People love to gossip about someone else's life. Not surprisingly, the topic of romantic relationships is one of the favorite topics for discussion. And washing the bones of people who visually do not match each other is more pleasant than looking for flaws in couples in which they obviously do not exist.

What do psychologists think?

Psychologists believe that if a girl likes men 15 years older, then she has some problems with her father. If a lady had a happy childhood, which she spent with her father and mother, growing up, the girl will look at her peers, and not at people of her age. And if the girl did not have a father, or when the daughter was in her teens, the man left the family, then the girl will do her best to find a replacement for her father. Such a rebellion occurs not only in the period of youthful exploration, but even at a conscious age. The lady could not overcome her complexes, and therefore she would try to find care and support from an older man.

You havepartner age difference of 15 years? The man is older than you, and this seems to you something out of the ordinary? Psychologists are of the same opinion. A normal man who does not suffer from an inferiority complex will try to find a woman of his age. And those men who look at young girls most often suffer from an inferiority complex. They want to boost their self-esteem at the expense of others.

Pros

If many young girls date men 10-15 years older, then they have some reason to do so. What are the benefits of having an older partner?

• Beautiful courtship. An experienced man knows how to please a woman. He will pamper her with attention, bring gifts, gallantly open doors and take her to various establishments. Many women's hearts melt from such care.
• Men aged make good money. Are you and your partner 15 years apart? The man is older, which means he has already managed to realize himself in his career. And this means that your gentleman has good income. Girls like to spend money, especially other people's money.
• Interesting conversations. Girls always love to talk. Much can be discussed with peers, but adult men can always surprise, tell something interesting to help a girl figure something out.
• New sexual experience. An adult man lived a long and eventful life. During this time, he was able to learn a lot, so he has the opportunity to surprise his partner every night.
• The man wantssettle down. Many girls at the age of 25 have a desire to start a family. But peers often do not make offers, referring to the fact that you need to build a career, and only then think about children. Older men already want children, as they managed to realize themselves in the work sphere.

Cons

People often condemn what they are not used to. For example, many people believe that if a man is 15 years older, marriage with him is doomed. But still, young wives themselves complain about many husbands. What do they see as the disadvantages of living with a partner who is older than them?

• A man does not lead an active life. A young woman is by nature very active. She wants to go everywhere and see everything. Ladies go to clubs, exhibitions and parties with pleasure. A man who is much older than his chosen one will not show much desire to accompany his missus to all sorts of social events.
• A person may not want children. For example, if a man already has adult children from his first marriage, he may decide that he has had enough of them, and now it is time to live for himself, and not for the sake of offspring. What if the woman is 15 years older than the man? Reviews of men who met with adult ladies are very mixed. Young people complain that their chosen one refuses, and often can no longer give them an heir.
• Condemnation of parents and friends. Misunderstanding on the part of society and constant reproaches from loved ones will annoy a person. And over time, when the influx of feelings subsides, constant talk about the difference inage can lead to the breakup of relationships.

Should I decide on such a relationship?

A handsome man approached you to meet you? You need to immediately assess the age of a person. If a man is 15 years older than a girl, then you need to continue meetings with a bias towards romance with great care. Why? The likelihood that a man decides to have some fun at your expense is very high. Men who are 15 years older than young girls are most often married. Such persons go through a midlife crisis and decide to see if they can still attract the opposite sex. Such a game will be in one goal. A man can take a girl on dates and buy her various trinkets. But nothing will come out of this novel. If a girl is just interested in the experience of meeting with an adult man, then she can afford to have some fun. But in this case, you should not fantasize that a prince on a white horse appeared to you in the guise of a cute patron. Be aware that you are most likely dating someone's husband and father. Would you be happy with the prospect of some young lady meeting your dad when you were waiting for him at home? Not? Then try to check the information about the fact that your missus definitely does not have a family and children.

And if love?

If a woman is 15 years older than a man, can their romance last forever? Theoretically, this is quite possible. But in practice, it's unbelievable. Why? Love and family for a woman always come first. And for a man, the main thing -comfortable existence and successful self-development. Men receive pleasure from love to a lesser extent. Sex is really important for them, but feelings are secondary. Men can love one woman all their lives if she can provide him with a comfortable existence and will arrange surprises from time to time. Is an aged lady capable of this? Quite. But soon the lady will lose her physical attractiveness, and as you know, men love with their eyes.

There are many examples of couples in which the husband is 15 years older than the wife, and people are happy together. But this is an exception to the rule. Have you met a handsome and smart young man who treats you with special attention? It is not surprising that the girl will fall in love with such an ideal gentleman. But you should not put on rose-colored glasses and immediately go down the aisle with a person. Take a closer look at your older friend. If you really understand that this is a soul mate, then do not listen to anyone, listen to your heart and common sense. If they suggest linking your fate with the person you have chosen, then age will not be an obstacle to happiness and a pleasant family life.

Psychological problems

If a woman is 15 years older than a man, and still she attracts her boyfriend, then the lady needs to think about whether her partner really loves her, and does not use her? Today there are a lot of young people who do not want to work, but want to live at someone else's expense. It's no surprise that guys like this can throw wedges on successful ladies who lack male attention. These women have problems with menand therefore they agree to an affair with the first person they meet who will show sympathy for their candidacy. Why are smart and pretty ladies forced to be content with gigolos? All human problems are in his head, and the roots of these problems should be sought in childhood. If parents disliked a person, then he will seek tenderness and warmth from everyone around him. And for childless women of age, the problem can also be superimposed that they want a child, but at one time did not have time to give birth to it. A young lover is perceived by the ladies as a child who needs warmth and affection.

Men who are looking for a young life partner, too, do not have a he althy psyche. Despite the fact that nature has laid in men the instinct of reproduction, and a male person can conceive a child at any age, a man has a limited lifespan. And in adulthood, a man must understand that he cannot afford to have children, since he simply will not have time to raise his daughters and sons.

Why do women like older men?

The reasons for this predilection of women lies in the benefits that men can give in age. Modern young girls dream of a beautiful life. Is the man 15 years older? Most likely, he already has some experience, took place as a "getter", built a career and can help make many dreams come true! The gentleman will buy beautiful outfits, take him to restaurants and cinema. The lady will be able to develop her creative potential and separate from her parents. The girl will move to her lover andwill have complete freedom of action. In this scenario, the lady wins a lot and loses nothing. Yes, she pays for all the services rendered to her with her body, but not many ladies perceive such a payment as prostitution.

Older men can not only give a girl a lot, but they can also help her develop and become better. They say whoever you hang out with, that's what you'll get. Young girls, often arriving in the company of their boyfriend, willy-nilly listen to the conversations that smart friends of their lover are having. And in order not to look very stupid, the girl has to work on herself, read a lot and study previously unnecessary information. Such self-development forms a girl as an intellectual and intelligent person.

How will parents and friends react?

When a man is 15 years older, a girl doesn't really want to introduce her boyfriend to her parents. Why? The older generation can rarely adequately perceive the liberties of modern society. Someone may say that young ladies in ancient times were married to people twice their age. But in modern society, this approach to marriage is condemned. Parents will treat their daughter's boyfriend badly if he is not the same age as her. They will assume that a man is using their daughter to satisfy his sexual desire. Even if it's half true, few parents will listen to a grown man's explanation.

The lady's friends will also condemn her relationship. A gentleman who is 15 years older than a woman will not be able, and will not want to maintain friendship with friends of his beloved. He will avoid youth parties in every possible way, as they will seem too boring to the person.

Weather at home

How are things in a family in which a man is 15 years older than his wife? In most cases, the partner will be jealous of his young darling for any member of the stronger sex. A man will be aware that every year he gets older, and less and less he can give to his woman. But young rivals can easily take the girl away. Constant jealousy from scratch will annoy the girl, and in the end, if the man does not stop annoying the woman with reproaches, she can really start cheating on the missus.

Children in the family will partly help smooth out the age difference between spouses. But such magic will only work while the children are small. Then, when the children need to be taken to clubs, sports activities and development courses, parents may have problems in their approach to education. The difference between generations will leave its mark on the minds of people, and on many issues they may not come to a common denominator. And this is fraught with serious disagreements that can lead to divorce. Therefore, if you received an offer from a pretty, but adult person, do not rush to get married. First, get to know the person better and live with him under the same roof. If your life is a fairy tale for a few years, you can formalize your relationship.